You Can Share My Umbrella....

Have I ever mentioned that I am really not good with - well - people?

I should clarify a bit. I'm a loyal friend, a good listener, and I do my utmost to be thoughtful and sensitive and helpful and all those things that are valuable in a friend. In short, I'm somebody you'd usually be glad to have on your team.

The problems arise when I have to communicate with people I don't know very well. If there's not an immediate connection - that spark of recognition when you meet someone who floats on the same wavelength - then I tend to flounder a bit. I fail to pick up on cues and misread tone and body language. I get antsy at uncomfortable silences in conversation. I rabbit on at a manic pace, desperately seeking a talking point that will elicit some spark of interest from the other party. In the end, I usually end up apologizing for all the bouncing around and do my best to slink away with a shred of dignity while the other person is left to puzzle over what in the world I was getting at and why I looked so terrified.

I can't recall exactly when I realized that my skills in verbal conversation where somewhat uneven, but I suspect it was fairly early on. It's something to do with why I started writing in the first place. It was only through conversations with myself, as it were, in a piece of writing that I began to find my path to really reaching other people.

It is in that vein that I present, with a wee bit of abashed pride, my first foray into publication. My article on LDSwoman.net went up today (in the "Time For You" section) along with some spectacular photos that superbly capture the mood of the piece. The photos are not mine, though I could wish they were. And although the irony of being published for the first time in an LDS-Inspired forum is not lost on me, I am incredibly impressed with the concept of the site and the combination of the striking photography and inspirational content brought a tear to even my cynical eye. And, crankypants that I am, tears that don't involve rage or frustration are a rare treat for me these days.

So go read it. And tell your friends to read it. Then tell them to come here and read about my experiences with accidentally purchasing adult novelties on someone else's credit card, just so it's clear I don't claim to be some sort of fountain of great wisdom. I'm just a girl who had a story to tell, and who tends to tell much better stories when I'm having the conversation with myself. Because I don't do so well with, you know... other people.