Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Still.. Yet... Living.

I have been inexcusably absent of late. I realize. I will explain later, but mostly it involves lots of running around, doing chores, preparing to do our taxes, and even - GASP! - a bit of social interaction not centered around my children. I know! It's like living in some sort of parallel universe, one where I actually feel like a regular person sometimes!

So, then, lacking in any wisdom of my own to share today beyond "don't eat yellow snow" (which is not as useful as you might think, since we have had 2 days of rain and a sadly obvious lack of snow...) I submit instead....

The Zen Parenting Wisdom of Oh The Joys. She rather brilliantly does something that I think many parents struggle to do -- which is to effectively apply acquired life wisdom to the raising of children. Because keeping our cool, actively choosing how to interact and respond to our children: these are things that require conscious choice on our part as parents.

My sister and I had a conversation recently wherein I finally managed to articulate my major Zen Life Philosophy. It's been brewing for a long time, but I was able to put it into words for the first time.

My ultimate goal is to Live Life On Purpose. The most important thing I DON'T want to do is to go with the flow, take the path of least resistance, or live my life according to habit or my emotional responses. Everything in our lives that we are dissatisfied with can only be changed by active decision on our part. It's not going to magically happen -- whether "it" is raising our children to be the best people they can be, achieving the personal or professional success we desire, or even just getting ahead of the housework or getting physically healthier.

My goal for this year is to attack these things one at a time, prioritize which are the most important to me, and actively improve each one. I think that OTJ has hit the nail on the head -- finding the Zen in the Parenting Zoo requires making a decision to bring as much of the Zen to the table as we possibly can.

So how about delurking and weighing in? What are your tricks for keeping your cool and keeping Zen in raising your kids?

Personally? I find that when I'm stressed to my limit, making time for a bubble bath with a hot cup of chamomile tea after the house is quiet can do wonders for my mental state. Also, getting out in the sunshine and letting the kids run around crazy (until I am inevitably lured into joining them and flying around in the fresh air like a five-year-old, myself) helps me fall in love with my rugrats all over again.

2 comments:

danny said...

I tell you what, nothing feels better than whacking a bunch of golf balls or going to the batting cages and taking out frustrations and pent up aggressions on helpless batting cage baseballs.
Or if you can't do that, find the nearest go-cart track and crash into the other people.

OhTheJoys said...

Since I am no guru either, I have to say... that choosing stuff? Pretty hard moment by moment. Oh, the FLEETING Zen... Hey, Zen! Come Back!!