Standing on the Edge

... the edge of the kitchen island, in this case. When using a chair to climb atop the kitchen island in order to finish the install of the two-light island fixture, it is wise to note that an 18 month old child is surprisingly adept at moving chairs.

I realized this today as I heard the wooden feet of the chair scraping across the kitchen floor. By the time I had figured out how to climb down from my precarious perch without sending the glass light domes to their doom on the floor, the little bugger had helped himself to several unopened cans of diet Pepsi, and was enthusiastically rifling through the junk drawer on a very intent treasure-seeking mission.

Who knew we had 9-volt batteries in the house? What do we even own that uses 9-volt batteries? The last time I remember the need of one involved being 9 years old and sticking my tongue to both contact points. It was a very important dare. Or something.

I'm also working on finding good uses for several 34 cent stamps, half a hot glue stick, and a match book from some bar in Mexico I have no memory of going to on our honeymoon.

I'm taking 2 lessons from all of this.

First, I obviously need to invest in invisible fencing for the baby for use when working on home improvement projects. Second, if I don't clean out the junk drawers soon, I just might someday end up "that lady" on the news. You've heard those stories -- reclusive woman is found, dead for days, half-eaten by her pets. amidst ginormous stacks of old magazines and balls of twine.

It is definitely time for Spring Cleaning at our casa. Anybody in desperate need of 20 yellow security envelopes? 17 tea candles? A tush-load of ridiculously large paper clips? Because I am flush with all of the above, and will totally hook y'all up. I'm generous and thoughtful that way.

What's that? You have no use for my priceless treasures? Fine then. Be that way. I don't need to give my useless crap to you - that's why God invented eBay. Huzzah!