For the past few weeks my beloved laptop has been running slower and slower. It was as though it was choking on a ham-bone, and I had forgotten my heimlich maneuver. (Which would never happen -- I'd be very handy in a choking emergency, having been certified 3 or 4 times over the years for reasons that are not abundantly clear to me now. But it's not the "why" that matters... it's that I know what your zyphoid process is and how not to send it back into your chest cavity to puncture a lung.)
Ah, but I digress.
So back to the laptop. Which has been slow.
Now, because I am very cheap, I have been attempting to avoid actually paying to get a spyware remover. Which we decided I needed after T took a look at my Task Manager and silently imploded. Because apparently there are several totally unnecessary things running in the background which are more likely to explain the slowness of my computer than my own theory -- which had something to do with buying the computer a helmet and putting it on the short bus.
And so? I sit here. Installing a second program. Because the one I thought was free before was only free for scanning. So it told me I had 64 items to remove, and then sweetly asked for $40 to remove them.
It was like being at the auto mechanic. Or the Dentist. Either way? I felt mildly violated and more than a little regretful at the lack of ability to pummel the creators of said program with a Nerf bat.
So many conflicts in life would be better addressed with a good Nerf Bat fight. Hitting things with one is decidedly satisfying, and yet very unlikely to end with a summons for assault and battery.
But, alas, the only person in Nerf-Bat-Striking-Distance was T. And he was busy studying for his classes... hence, I was disarmed by the cuteness of his intellectualism.
So now I have to eat some chocolate and install this program. And do a ritualistic dance of appeal to the computer gods to please PLEASE make the evil programs go away so I can design the HOA website in peace.
Oh, I'm sorry. Was that boring? Frustrating, perhaps? Was it mind-numbingly banal?
Misery loves company, baby. Find you some chocolate. It helps. Trust me.
2 comments:
spybot or ad-aware. Or both. Google them, they are both FREE baby! And will remove any nasties on your computer, if they are at all removable. I prefer ad-aware, but they both work and I use both.
~Kandyce
oh yers is like mine...laptops and men that is. i gave up custody for a little while and the man was a bit confounded. all though mine always takes the free route (or better yet the free through work route). nerf bat...now that is a concept indeed :)
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